Liverpool FC’s inability to win the title since 1990 has been blamed on a various people over the years, including David Moores; Rick Parry; Graeme Souness; Roy Evans, Gerard Houllier and, most recently, Tom Hicks and George Gillett. The real blame, however, for the club’s abject failure to bring home the trophy Bill Shankly famously called ‘our bread and butter’ lies solely at the feet of one man: former President of South Africa and anti-apartheid activist, Nelson Mandela.
As I will illustrate with cold, hard facts, Mr Mandela’s negative influence on the club simply cannot be denied. Indeed, the startling confluence of events that have led me to my ultimate conclusion will make even the most ardent Liverpool fan reconsider their ingrained opinions about who or what is to blame for the club’s league demise over the last 19 years.
So, let’s consider the facts:
In 1959, Bill Shankly took control of a club that was languishing in the English second division. At this time, Mr Mandela was a free man.
In 1962, Mr Mandela was arrested and imprisoned after being on the run for 17 months. The same year, Liverpool won promotion to the first division.
In 1964, Mr Mandela was sentenced to life imprisonment for, amongst other things, his alleged involvement in a conspiracy to help other countries invade South Africa.
That same year, Liverpool won the league for the first time in 17 years, a number that matches the length of time Mr Mandela was on the run.
Coincidence? I think not.
Over the next 27 years, Liverpool became the most successful British football team of all time, winning a whole host of trophies, including 12 league titles, 4 European Cups, 4 FA Cups and 2 UEFA cups.
In 1990 - after 27 years behind bars - Mr Mandela was released from prison. Three months after his release, Liverpool won the league title for the last time.
At the time of writing, Mr Mandela has been a free man for 19 years; In that time, Liverpool FC have failed to win the league title.
The facts speak for themselves: Liverpool’s dominance of English football began with Mr Mandela’s imprisonment in 1964 and ended with his release in 1990.
Coincidence? Once again, I think not.
I don't think it is too much of an exaggeration to suggest that Liverpool FC's league success is inextricably linked to Mr Mandela's liberty, or lack thereof.
As I have shown, Mr Mandela's freedom pre-1964 and post-1990 has coincided with Liverpool's barren run in the league. The inarguable conclusion must be that the club can only be successful in the league if Mr Mandela is in prison.
It is clear that after 19 painful years without league success, the insidious influence of Mr Mandela must be addressed NOW.
With Manchester United only one title away from potentially overtaking our precious league record, desperate times call for desperate measures. As such, it is our duty as fans to address the damaging impact Mr Mandela's freedom is having on the club's ability to win league titles .
To that end, I have hired a team of the world’s top lawyers to examine the terms of Mr Mandela’s 1990 release documents in the hope of discovering evidence of any legal loopholes/procedural inconsistencies/Judicial improprieties that would retrospectively invalidate the release.
Liverpool fans can do their part by campaigning for Mr Mandela’s immediate re-imprisonment and signing this online petition:
www.sendmandelabacktoprison.com
Upon collection of as many signatures as possible, the petition will be delivered to current South African President Mr Jacob Zuma for (hopefully) immediate action.
Back in 1990, people around the world - including millions of Liverpool fans - were shouting 'Free Mandela!' as they campaigned for the great man's release. Hindsight is a wonderful thing; little did those fans know that they were effectively sabotaging their own club.
19 years later and the chant has changed: 'Jail Mandela!' must become every Liverpool fan's mantra for the coming season, and every premiership ground must reverberate with the power of the Liverpool faithful's commitment to the cause.
The needs of the club outweigh the needs of the individual; with the greatest fans in the world working together in the spirit of 'The Liverpool Way', the goal of having Mr Mandela returned to prison can be achieved, and Liverpool FC can be restored to its rightful place at the pinnacle of English football.
JAIL MANDELA!!
* Just in case anyone misunderstands (!) this article is purely tongue in cheek and meant as a bit of fun.
----------------------------
As I will illustrate with cold, hard facts, Mr Mandela’s negative influence on the club simply cannot be denied. Indeed, the startling confluence of events that have led me to my ultimate conclusion will make even the most ardent Liverpool fan reconsider their ingrained opinions about who or what is to blame for the club’s league demise over the last 19 years.
So, let’s consider the facts:
In 1959, Bill Shankly took control of a club that was languishing in the English second division. At this time, Mr Mandela was a free man.
In 1962, Mr Mandela was arrested and imprisoned after being on the run for 17 months. The same year, Liverpool won promotion to the first division.
In 1964, Mr Mandela was sentenced to life imprisonment for, amongst other things, his alleged involvement in a conspiracy to help other countries invade South Africa.
That same year, Liverpool won the league for the first time in 17 years, a number that matches the length of time Mr Mandela was on the run.
Coincidence? I think not.
Over the next 27 years, Liverpool became the most successful British football team of all time, winning a whole host of trophies, including 12 league titles, 4 European Cups, 4 FA Cups and 2 UEFA cups.
In 1990 - after 27 years behind bars - Mr Mandela was released from prison. Three months after his release, Liverpool won the league title for the last time.
At the time of writing, Mr Mandela has been a free man for 19 years; In that time, Liverpool FC have failed to win the league title.
The facts speak for themselves: Liverpool’s dominance of English football began with Mr Mandela’s imprisonment in 1964 and ended with his release in 1990.
Coincidence? Once again, I think not.
I don't think it is too much of an exaggeration to suggest that Liverpool FC's league success is inextricably linked to Mr Mandela's liberty, or lack thereof.
As I have shown, Mr Mandela's freedom pre-1964 and post-1990 has coincided with Liverpool's barren run in the league. The inarguable conclusion must be that the club can only be successful in the league if Mr Mandela is in prison.
It is clear that after 19 painful years without league success, the insidious influence of Mr Mandela must be addressed NOW.
With Manchester United only one title away from potentially overtaking our precious league record, desperate times call for desperate measures. As such, it is our duty as fans to address the damaging impact Mr Mandela's freedom is having on the club's ability to win league titles .
To that end, I have hired a team of the world’s top lawyers to examine the terms of Mr Mandela’s 1990 release documents in the hope of discovering evidence of any legal loopholes/procedural inconsistencies/Judicial improprieties that would retrospectively invalidate the release.
Liverpool fans can do their part by campaigning for Mr Mandela’s immediate re-imprisonment and signing this online petition:
www.sendmandelabacktoprison.com
Upon collection of as many signatures as possible, the petition will be delivered to current South African President Mr Jacob Zuma for (hopefully) immediate action.
Back in 1990, people around the world - including millions of Liverpool fans - were shouting 'Free Mandela!' as they campaigned for the great man's release. Hindsight is a wonderful thing; little did those fans know that they were effectively sabotaging their own club.
19 years later and the chant has changed: 'Jail Mandela!' must become every Liverpool fan's mantra for the coming season, and every premiership ground must reverberate with the power of the Liverpool faithful's commitment to the cause.
The needs of the club outweigh the needs of the individual; with the greatest fans in the world working together in the spirit of 'The Liverpool Way', the goal of having Mr Mandela returned to prison can be achieved, and Liverpool FC can be restored to its rightful place at the pinnacle of English football.
JAIL MANDELA!!
* Just in case anyone misunderstands (!) this article is purely tongue in cheek and meant as a bit of fun.
----------------------------
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51 COMMENTS:
Hmmmm. An entirely unneccessary article
Hmmm. An entirely unneccessary comment. How about acquiring a sense of humour?
ha ha ha what aload of bullshit excuses excuses excuses thoose desperate fuckers are blaming nelson mandela ha ha ha thanks for the great laugh.............again
Please tell me you're aware that this article is supposed to be ironic :-O
You don't really believe this is a serious attempt to blame Mr Mandela for Liverpool's failure to win the league...do you?
If so, hopefully you'll be recaptured very soon.
You'll never EVER win the league again.
LOL.
Extremely interetsing...so if Mr. Mandela kops it.. we would be back in buisness and unless he comes back from the dead... we shall rule the roost at the top of the football world forever...
Ifidadnedbinfermandela.....
You have too much time in your hands, Mr. Kanwar, I'll give you that.
Indeed. The fact that this is my first article for almost 2 months is clearly a testament to the fact I have too much time on my hands...
oh my god. i'm pissing myself at the comments from the bunch of inane fucks that thought this was meant to be taken seriously.
Cmon people,, this is just fun as Jamie said it's all tongue in cheek.. though interesting to see Jamie go from
IfidadnedbinferRafa to
IfidadnedbinferMandela..
wonder what all that fuss was about
Jamie I think this is the best article you've ever written. Well done.
We should get Gerry Dammers to re-write his song, great article.
I think we may have sent a load of fans in red shirts out there to capture him under the disguise of being rugby fans.
Buddy, stop being an idiot.
Buddy, stop being such a humourless curmudgeon.
Dont mind the gimps Jaimie. Top class tongue in cheek article!
this article is the closest Jamie has ever come to have some real insight into LFC. I look forward to the next one where Jamie determines that Liverpools 19 year drought is aligned to Steven Gerrard putting his boots on in the wrong order for the last 19 years.
Made me laugh that did, cheers Jamie!
im May 1990 we won our last title. in June 1990 i married my wife and we have never won it since, so the blame is on my wife, time to get rid of her i think, lol
Yes, for the sake of the club, divorce has to be an option here ;-D
This article is brilliant. I haven't laughed so much in ages.
If I'm not wring, Liverpool has failed to win the league with Calrsberg as main sponsor
Jaimie, please stick to your policy of deleting these idiots' comments. I loved the article. Brilliant. LMAOed.
Anyway, what do you think of Owen to Man U? Gamble, or brilliant move?
Hey Bikram. I think it's a no-lose situation for Man U. They got Owen on a free on an (allegedly) pay as you play deal. If he doesn't score any goals they haven't really lost anything.
I'm not the greatest fan of Michael Owen but what is indisputable is that once upon a time he was a world class goalscorer. He repeatedly did the business for Liverpool at all levels and for England on the biggest stage.
He may have lost some pace but you never lose that predatory eye for goal and the ability to be in the right place at the right time.
Also, Owne's confidence and hunger will go through the roof now that Man U have signed him. He'll be desperate to impress and will do everything in his power to make the move a success.
I personally think it's a masterstroke by Alex Ferguson. I have no doubt Owen will score goals; he'll get 1000% better service than he did at Newcastle and a hell of a lot more chances.
I wish him well. If he can get back on track and get back into the England team I think it will enhance the national team's chances of doing well at next year's world cup.
I would have liked to see Owen back at Anfield to be honest. Whatever you think about him, he's still a better option than the likes of Voronin and Ngog.
And you just know that the script is already written; he will score against Liverpool at some stage next season, just like the script was written for Robbie Keane to score against us at the end of last season.
let's just hope it's not a crucial goal!
Ahhhh so Carlsberg is NOT the best lager in the world..... well, probably! :o)
This is a bit like the Andes Plane Crash Cookbook about as funny as a rash - ill conceived and pretty ignorant - I'm ashamed of such sentiments even as a joke
hahahaha top post Jaimie,I laughed like a baby! :)
and to the morons who took it seriously,your stupidity is even more funny than the article.
in hindsight it is very easy to find a underlying pattern using numbers with pretty much anything. however using nelson mandela and his jail time during the civil rights movement of south africa for the above is a bit distasteful. why did the author need to use mandela? its a little disrespectful and also the association can be misleading. it might conjure a few laughs however the author would have been able to do that using other means. sorry but a true liverpool fan would have more common sense.
"Our life's a stage, a comedy: either learn to play and take it lightly or bear irs troubles patiently"
-Palladas (4th century Greek poet)
You could also blame Rod Stewart look at this Page http://www.sheetmusicplus.com/title/Storyteller-1964-1990/2939914
I agree, Jaimie, even if Owen fails, which I don't think he will, it wouldn't have been a gamble because he's so cheap. I was actually hoping Rafa would get Owen as a back-up striker, and somewhat resurrect his career, just like he did with Fowler. But I know one other thing, though, Owen is dead to me. I started supporting Liverpool because I loved Owen, so its a big deal as far as I'm concerned. Of course, now, Liverpool is far greater than the sum of its parts, so even if the whole team and the management departs to our rivals or whatever, its still my team, but I still feel somewhat betrayed.
..we are all allowed to take life a little lightly and laugh at ourselves..keeps us sane.
but this article disrespects the great man who is over 90 years old and continues to work for human rights.
Knight, its people with attitudes like yours which are a major factor to all the intolerance and discrimination in the world. I have read Mr Mandela's autobiography and read from other sources of the man and I can confidently say that he would find this article funny.
What an entirely classless article. The irony that the author is trying to achieve is non-existent. Advocating the return to jail of a man who has done nothing just so LFC can win a league is despicable at best. Kanwar you have finally plumed depths of bad taste i never thought could be achieved. Congratulations on possibly the worst example of journalism i have seen in some time. One would hope that the sun would not even stoop these depths again.
[The Dude] Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man. [/The Dude]
how unfunny is this artcile? incredible.
also, has anyone noticed yet that that Nelson mandela was actually free in 1990 when we lifted our last championship. sort of renders teh whole thing rather pointless
Are you being deliberatly dim? The point of the article (I believe) is that Liverpool have failed to win the title SINCE 1990. Mandela was released in 1990 and that was the last time the club won the title. It's not that difficult to grasp ya know...
Many 'anonymous' guys showing their colective 'Borg' mentality. Complete set of sense-of-humour by-pass operations. I love these no-names, who get all offended on behalf of ol' Nelson.
Mandela was released during July or August (haven't even googled that). I remember distinctly because I missed the whole release hoopla, as I was on away on summer-holiday.
Seeing Mickey O in a Manyoo shirt will make a sight I've never had to witness. They had it when we had Ince - but the shoe is on the other foot now. I do hope he does well, but it goes to show how he sees the things. There was never a communal hush when he was being interviewed post-game. Too scripted!
Beardo - so erm what your saying is that the league has been won since mandela has been free, no?
Its no sense of humour by pass, its that this article just isn't funny, in the slightest.
anyone who thinks it is, is severely lacking entertainment in their lives
We'd be better off jailing all murdering scousers... wonder what the correlation between English clubs murdering fans and Liverpool's involvement in said murdering is?
wot a muppet u r.
Was laughing so hard I had to close all the windows - thank you Jaimie.
Wow.. Id never knew Scousers would swoop that low.The reason you'll never win a PL is because you are pathetic bin dippers.
MUFC 18 TIMES FACT!
who let the dog out.
<span><span>Jaimie Kanwar! </span></span>What if based on your article I kill nelson mandela and then later on I find that liverpool does not win the league. I will kill you. There are many like me in this planet. when you get the opprtunity to write stuff please write like a pro. No many are given the opportunity to write on the net.
Just of because <span><span>Jaimie Kanwar a son will lose his dad, a country will lose a great person. </span></span><span><span>Jaimie Kanwar while you have control on what you write do you have control on the people reading it and what's the purpose of writing "* this article is bullshit dont take is seriously" in small characters.
</span></span>
Here in africa we are very angry.
What if we Get rid of <span><span>Jaimie Kanwar by any means. </span></span><span><span>You have angered the supporters of Mandela.</span></span><span></span>
ohh, this is fuckiest humour on earth..hahaha
Flipping hilarious article! I can't believe people could take it so seriously.
I'm afraid i have to confess- i am the reason we haven't won the league since 1990. How was i to know then as a little six-year old that i was going to be such a jonah! I am prepared though to make the ultimate sacrifice-i will support man u in 2010/11 season which hopefully will see them struggle to stay in top 4, lose Fergie and clear the way for Liverpool fc finally to reclaim their rightful crown. Please let it work!!!!
dumbass. this isn't serious. oh my... what a twunt (twat-cunt)!
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